There’s a ridiculous moment in Disney’s JUNGLE CRUISE where the Rock is using a wrestling move to pin a jaguar between a scrapping scorpion and a tarantula – that’s probably the highlight. Muddy action, inane comic exchanges and bad slapstick does not a great combination make, no matter how many random AGUIRRE, THE WRATH OF GOD references you throw in. Steamboat Captain Frank Wolff (Dwayne Johnson) takes botanist Dr Lily Houghton (Emily Blunt) and her brother MacGregor (Jack Whitehall) down the Amazon river in search of magical flower but Frank’s past and supernatural forces soon catch up with them. Take a drink every time Dwayne Johnson mentions Emily Blunt is wearing trousers and you won’t survive the runtime. This is a lazy, uninspired and transparent attempt to replicate the success of PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN that’s not even with a Disney+ free trial. SSP